Staying Strong in the Hard Times

Staying Strong by Rohan Jain

 

We all make mistakes, but sometimes it’s hard to remember that when we’re in the midst of them. We’re always going to make mistakes, so I think the most important thing is to focus on our intentions and moral compasses. We can try to do our best, but we will never be perfect.

You probably don’t need me to tell you that life is inherently hard. It’s hard to forge real, deep, lasting relationships with others. It’s hard to find work that gives your life meaning and that you’re good at.

Human tends to make mistakes , it’s a fate that you can’t avoid . We learn by trial and error but learns much faster when trials are similar and errors are clearer. The artisans trials are unlike the carpenter which are largely the same from furniture to furniture – same material, tools, workspace , designs and his errors are easy to identify – the furniture falls for its finishing ; that the design didn’t turnout according to the ideology.

Life’s not like that. The variables that contribute to your success or failure are innumerable, and your failures are much harder to read. Furniture making is a game of skill more than luck. But life? More luck than skill.


 

Build Mental Strength Before Strong It’s the Only Choice You Have

There will be times when you’re going to need all the mental strength you can muster. So, it’s important to make mental strength training a daily habit.

There are few key ideas I stick to when the going gets tough, in order to stay robust and be resilient. We tend to make mistakes because we often forget these ideas. The thinking becomes overly pessimistic and gloomy.

One of the things you can do is READING, it really helps to see things with different perspectives. I’ve a collection of books which can help you, check it out for free here

Remember these important points while you’re experiencing hard times in life:

 

  • You’ve Overcome Challenges Before

A way to address the feeling that a bad situation will never end is by thinking about similar situations that you went through in the past and you’ve successfully overcome. You can find a precedent nearly every time if you think hard enough.
When you do this, it acts as a reminder of your ability to handle challenges and get passed them. It boosts your sense of self-confidence and it eliminates the sense of helplessness.

 

  • Take It As A Learning Experience

Most learning in life comes from trial and error. And when things aren’t going the way you want them to go, the best thing you can do is to try to understand why this is happening, and learn from the experience. It is by learning and applying that learning that you’ll eventually turn things around.

It is often said in the personal development world that there is no failure, only feedback.

 

  • It Happens to Everybody

When facing hardship, our thinking will trick us into believing that this happens only to us. Other people don’t go through the kind of difficulties we go through. It almost seems like the universe is plotting against us and wants to hurt us. However, with a bit of lucid reflecting, you’ll quickly realize this is not true.

What’s true is that you’re hyper-aware of your troubles because they’re, you know, yours. But you’re not nearly as aware of other people’s trouble, which makes it seem like they have it much better than you. This is highly unlikely though.

So, remember that whatever happens to you, in the same form or a related one, happens to almost everybody.

 

  • There Are a Lot of Things to Be Grateful For

So, some things aren’t going well in your life. That’s less than ideal, but if you think about it, there are still lots of things that are going well in your life and there is still a lot to be grateful for.

Maybe your romantic relationship is in trouble, but you have a great career. Maybe your career is in trouble, but you still have your health and your family. And there are so many small but significant things to be grateful for: a walk in the park, a cup of coffee, a nice sunset, a casual conversation.

When going through tough times in life, think about this for a second and start noticing the things to be grateful for. It will completely change your perspective.

 

  • Even Bad Times End

Everything ends. Whether it’s good or bad, it doesn’t last forever. When a situation is troubling for you, it may seem as if it will never end. But that’s just a subjective and distorted perception.

Our minds tend to expand negative events as they happen and so it appears like they’ve been going on for a lot more than they really did, and as if they will continue to go on for a long time. Nevertheless, even the worst kinds of situations end at some point. Sometimes you need to do something to make them end or hurry that moment. Other times, they will simply wither and die on their own, and all you can do is have patience and wait. Either way, things will change.


 

 

Follow the ABC Formula

Staying strong in the midst of hardship requires you to manage your thoughts, feelings, and behavior. Paying attention to all three areas will help you emerge from your struggles even stronger than before. To remember how to stay strong during life’s toughest challenges, follow the ABC formula.

 

Abc fromula by Rohan Jain

 

 

  • Accept reality

Acceptance doesn’t mean agreement. Instead, it’s about acknowledging what is happening from a realistic standpoint. So, while you may not agree with things like racism, you can accept that it happens.
Accepting what is happening right now–regardless of whether you think it’s right–is the first step in deciding how to respond.
Accepting reality is about recognizing what’s within your control. When you can’t control the situation, focus on controlling yourself.

 

 

  • Behave productively

Unproductive behavior, like complaining or throwing a pity party, will keep you stuck. Those behaviors will rob of mental strength.

Accepting reality helps you manage your thoughts and regulate your emotions–which are key to productive behavior. The choices you make when you’re faced with problems determine how quickly you’ll find a solution.
it’s important to ask yourself, “What’s one thing I can do right now to help myself?” Whether productive behavior involves facing a fear, or doing something you really don’t want to do, take action.

 

  • Control upsetting thoughts

Thinking, “This will never work. I’m not good enough,” or, “I can’t stand one more minute of this,” will derail you from your goals. It’s important to recognize when your inner monologue becomes overly pessimistic. Remember that just because you think something, doesn’t make it true.
Talk to yourself like you’d talk to a trusted friend. When your thoughts become catastrophic or unhelpful, respond with a more realistic statement that confirms your ability to handle your struggles.

 

Hope you find some value.

 

Check out my podcast, The RoCast, which can help you to become a better self.

Also, don’t forget to connect with me on Instagram.(@RohanJainGlobal)

 

Rohan Jain

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